My brain says "fall"

I know the calendars do not say that summer has ended yet.
I know that.
But my brain disagrees.
Violently.

Top Ten Reasons Why I Know It's Fall:
1. Football.  (Do I really need to say more?)
2. Okra plants are as tall as me.
3. The fruit is gone from the trees.
4. Cooler weather (which I LOVE!)
5. Decreased daylight time (which means fewer eggs).
6. Pecans are becoming more pronounced in the trees.
7. Back to school sales everywhere.
8. Massive decrease in friends on Facebook (comes with being friends with too many teachers/parents/homeschoolers).
9. Bobby's already requesting t-shirts under his shirts.
10. Tree leaves are starting to fall.

So say what you want.
Follow your calendar.
But in my heart of hearts and deep inside my brain, I know the truth.
Fall is here.

squirrels won again

The last few summers I've told you about my shock in going out to the fruit trees which were loaded, and finding next to nothing there. This summer we thought we were on top of things. My Dad picked pears twice for me while he was here (as opposed to waiting until the end of August, first of September), and I went out this morning to get one last batch before offering them to friends. We had decided we'd focus on the pears this year and tackle apples last.

Well, turns out, we won't focus on either. I went out this morning to pick, only to find ONE apple left on the tree and about SEVEN pears, all small.  Bobby laughed when I showed him, shook his head and said "That's amazing!"  Three days ago those trees were LOADED!

So I'm a little thankful to have less work, but it's also a bit of a disappointment. Maybe next year.

neglect

For the fourth time this summer, a friend on Facebook posted an article about the number of infants in America who have died (24) because their parents forgot them and left them in a carseat.  Invariably, a lot of opinions came out, many of them throwing out the neglect charge.  I will say this last friend has worked with foster children quite a bit, and has seen a large amount of neglect the last twenty years and knows all too well the horrors it reaks on a child's life.

And yet, I'm not ready to hurl that charge someone's direction just because they forgot a child.

Parents do forget children, especially young ones. I've seen it happen a number of times at many churches and schools. The first two times friends ranted about undisciplined partents forgetting their kids on Facebook, many of their friends immediately started sharing stories of times when they had forgotten their own children.  By the time person number six shared their story, the poster had to re-consider a lot of her condemnation.

I think it was last year (time seems to run together for me) when North Carolina started requiring car seats to be turned backwards for infants under a year old and first responders had very mixed reactions. They all agreed it was safer for a child EXCEPT the mother would not be able to see her child while driving AND would be more likely to NOT see her child when she exited the car in a hurry. They feared more cases of children being locked in cars and being forgotten would happen.

And I'm always amazed by the number of people who talk about how people are so distracted today and not focusing on what's important and that's why parents can forget their children. In my mother's infancy, car seats did not exist. A baby wouldn't be left in a car because it was behing held by someone or resting in the floor/seat beside the mother.  Then my generation comes along and there are carseats, not required, that can be placed where the mother can view the child. When something is in plain view, it makes it a little more difficult to forget about it. (We won't talk about getting to the bank and realizing you've left the check at home, etc).

For those of us who long for children but have not found that chapter written into our lives, there are many scenarios such as this one that are very hard to comprehend or fathom. And I find that what I consider neglect is not the same thing that others consider as neglect. Granted, almost everyone agrees not feeding a child, etc constitutes neglect, but there are many grey areas to this issue as well.

Chris Fitzsimon, who speaks on NC Spin about policies of the day has remarked on more than occasion that parents/teachers who teach their children dinosaurs roamed the earth 2,000 years ago are depriving their children of a good education.  I know thousands of children who are taught this by their teachers, and I would never charge them with neglect. Yet he and many others would.

I've known countless children who struggle with bedwetting. Most eventually outgrow it. One or two parents who've found themselves in that situation refuse to wash sheets every single day. To me, that borders on neglect. To a very tired, overworked Mom, it's a time-saving measure. And in those cases, I bite my tongue. I don't walk in their shoes day in, day out. And I also know how many times people have criticized my housekeeping, when they've never had to be a caregiver or keep my schedule.

So I cringe when someone lambasts another person who is facing one of the most heart-wrenching and desperate situations a person can face. I can be just as judgmental and haughty as the next person. To see such posts on Facebook forces me to look into the mirror at my own self, and it's not always a loving and compassionate portrait looking back at me. Charges of neglect are usually reflections of our neglect to see others with the love and compassion Christ has shown us.

moving right along

It is Monday and the day is almost gone (at least my free time part of it is) and my to do list has not shrunk much at all.

And for some strange reason, that actually doesn't bother me.

It's been a bit of busy yet slow kind of day.  I took a friend to the doctor this morning, and while waiting I was able to finish looking at a quilting magazine that's been on my dresser for a few weeks.

I was able to peacefully browse at two of my favorite stores after I took her home, which was nice.

We've picked produce out of the garden, and thankfully I bought cheesecloth while in one of those stores so I can start a batch of sweet pickles tonight.

It was nice to break our routine and be out of the house and not super aware of the quietness (my family was here for a few days last week, so the house has seemed exceptionally quiet since then). And I avoided the back to school section at Target when I went to pick up meds this afternoon. So I'm surviving, in my own way, the insanity of mind that August always brings as Facebook and Twitter bombards me with reminders that my life is very different from everyone else's.

Somewhat along the same lines, I lost some of my "aunt status" with my youngest niece last week. I cooked rabbit like I would cook barbeque chicken the first night they were here, and didn't tell anyone but Bobby. As everyone was finishing dessert, I asked them how they liked the meat. Suddenly everyone had wide eyes and startled expressions (which we found funny considering everyone thought it was chicken). My 9 year old niece immediately started, "That better not have been deer! Please tell me I didn't eat a deer!"  To which Bobby and I both laughed and said "No, it wasn't deer."  This started alarming everyone as they couldn't figure out what it was. When I said "rabbit", my nephew grinned real big, as did my sister (though with wide eyes) and as she turned to my nephew and said "Well, you've been wanting to know what rabbit tastes like. You can mark that off your hunting list" my niece immediately started crying. "I didn't want to eat a bunny!" and she ran from the room. While I was cleaning up the kitchen and deboning the rest of the meat, my nephew came in to take a picture so he could text his friends back home. Yes. Everything is perspective, and in my niece's eyes, I am no longer a cool aunt.

Hopefully the next time I post I'll actually have project photos to post. Meanwhile, I have several projects I'm tackling that I need to get busy on. I've not forgotten about my blog. I think about things to post and put up, but I've either been too busy or the computer has been occupied. I guess Bobby's retirement has been good in that way: I have less time on the computer and more time to do things.

what I'm not doing this week

I think I've now read/skimmed/observed a hundred Facebook/blogger posts about getting ready for school.

I'm not.

I have family coming to visit next week. So what I am doing this week is scrubbing cobwebs and fungus off the back porch, laundry, mopping floors, cleaning out the garage, and sewing.  Other than the back porch and the garage, it's just life as usual.

Well, not totally. Tomorrow is an exception.

And I'm starting a new project today (as opposed to the uncountable unfinished projects I alread have going).  Three years ago several friends and an out-of-state quilt show (I'll tell more details later) prompted the crazy idea to enter a quilt at the state fair. I did start a quilt that year, and decided there was no way, no how that quilt would either be finished or acceptable for the state fair that year. And I was write. (I did finally finish it last month, though.)  Saturday night I sketched out a few things, and Bobby helped me measure stuff and figure out dimensions. And today? I'm ready to start cutting. My goal is to spend 30 minutes to an hour every weekday until this thing is finished.  I need to double-check, but I think the entry deadline is the end of September. I'm more than a little excited.

And that's how my "end of summer" routine is shaping up. :)

#2

This past Saturday Cordova High School Class of 1991 lost its second member.
Jermaine Cook was 40 years old, has two children, and served our country in the US Army for 15 years.We knew him as "Wormy".  I don't know how he got that name, whether it was because he was short and wiry, or from his football skills, or from constantly moving, but it stuck.I remember him laughing, the group of guys he hung out with, and his rap performance in the school talent show (he did quite well).And those days still seem like yesterday.So this Saturday while I'm at a family reunion in North Carolina, my heart and thoughts will be in Alabama with my classmates as they cross the tracks to Mt. Zion church and weep and reminisce. I wish I could be there with them, to chat, to hug, to speak to his Mom. The night of our graduation, our principal challenged us to look around the room at everyone before we marched out, for that night would most likely be the last time we saw some of our classmates. We thought that was just dumb. But Mr. Cooper, once again, you were right.  We started out that school year with 55, by graduation we had 52. And since that night, we've lost two more. I guess sometimes ignorance truly is bliss. 

creeeepy

I was going to blog about gardening and time and whether or not it's worth it today, but about every three minutes I hear a noise here in the study. I don't know if it's paper's settling, a bird outside the window trying to build a nest, or a mouse, but it's really starting to creep me out. I think Bobby might get the computer early today.
And having said that, it's on to housework and errands! No more creepy noises for me!